Empower Yourself

The reality of relationships is that they start off strong and then they start to decline. This means less connection and responsiveness to your partner – getting too comfortable in the relationship. When you start to feel less connection with your partner, this usually results in feeling alone and more vulnerable to start an affair, rather it be emotional or physical – they are both just as painful to the betrayed partner. Here are a few tips on how to prevent your partner from cheating:

1. Remain Open and Vulnerable – this is the ability to turn to your partner and apologize, communicate to them if you feel that the two of you are distant, ask to be held if you’ve had a bad day, etc. Many people view this as being needy and immature, but it actually shows you are emotionally mature.
2. Maintain Connection – it can feel lonelier in a relationship vs. being single if there is too much distance between the two of you: Schedule dates, listen and validate, laugh and play.
3. The Power of Touch- let yourself relax emotionally and physically into the arms of your partner and you will reap the benefits of cuddling. When you hold each other, oxytocin is released in your brain, along with a host of other feel-good hormones that will leave you feeling happy and less stressed. A 2006 study by the Berman Center for Women’s Health in Chicago showed that couples that regularly indulge in spontaneous, non-sexual physical affection are more satisfied with their relationships.
4. Secure Sex – when the two of you have been successful with numbers 1-3 above, you can both enjoy secure sex. Secure sex can also be called Synchronicity sex. Dr. Sue Johnson explains 3 different types of sex: “Synchronicity sex is where eroticism, play, openness, and bonding come together and augment each other. In Solace sex, more anxiously-attached partners tend to focus on reassurance and affection rather than on eroticism. The third kind of sex is Sealed-off sex, where more avoidant partners focus mostly on sensation and performance.”

While nothing can provide absolute certainty that your partner won’t stray, these steps will help your relationship stay healthy and significantly minimize the chance of an affair.

Many Blessings,

Carissa